I’m Gonna Change My Name From “MOM”!

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Being a parent looks so easy when you aren’t one.

You have all the answers.  “If that was my kid…….”

When a baby cries during church service…….I’d take them out, of course.

When a child speaks disrespectfully in public to his parents……..I’d teach him respect.

When a child whines and cries and gets on everyone’s last nerve…….I’d give him something to cry about.

And then, you are a parent.  And you realize that you have no clue what you’re doing.

The lessons that you were so certain you could teach, they escape you because you have

entered some sort of survival mode.

You are so clueless that you don’t even know how clueless you are.

There is no vision for lessons to be learned or direction

of your parental influence because it’s all you can do to get through the day.

If you have now or have had two in diapers at once,

and possibly an older sibling or another on the way……

Consider yourself lucky if you read this from the safe confines of your home

and not from an institutional setting.

But you aren’t lucky.

You are blessed.

Surviving those early years as a parent isn’t easy.  Figuring it out as you go, trial and error.

Are we doing this right?

Sleepless nights, pulling out every possible ploy just to allow yourself to eat a meal.

And for moms, the phenomenon of struggling to find time to shower

(or use the potty alone).

You don’t give a flying fudgestick if your kids annoy other people in public because your life is a warzone.

Survival!

That day comes, you hear a baby squalling in church.  But it’s different now.

A wide smile takes over you whole face as you start looking around for that guy who’s thinking,

“if that was my kid…..”

You know now that it’s the sweetest sound in the world.

The days become more frequent when you can come up for air.

Kids can dress, feed, and bathe themselves.

Lost brain cells re-generate.  Perspective appears again.

This greatest realization comes at some point.

When you are blessed with children, every age is the greatest age!

Opportunities to teach lessons and learn them yourself,

they change in nature but not in number.

The joy of being a parent.  Some days, in the midst of life’s struggles,

you have to look harder to find it.  But it’s there.

Don’t become so occupied with life that you forget to look for the joy.

My own kids are 17, 15, 14, & 8 now.

I suppose having a senior in high school can bring one to a crisis of the mind.

For me, I find myself reflecting more now than at any other point in my life.

What did my wife and I do right as parents yesterday?

What can we do better tomorrow?

Now back to the original statement:

“I’m going to change my name from MOM”

Everyone has heard this humorous phrase in the world of badgering kids.

But in a world of badgering kids, there is no greater joy, blessing, or privilege

than being called MOM or DAD.

Each time we hear it, it should remind us that there is great purpose for our lives.

Every day that I hear the word “dad” (or daddy as my oldest still calls me),

it should remind me

that every day is the most important day of my life!

Heaven Help Me, I’ve Become A Liberal

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What the heck is a liberal?

Disclaimer first:  I don’t dig too deeply into politics.  For those of you who do, please forgive my errors in assumptions, classifications, definitions, and generalizations.

I associate liberalism with the practice of looking at that which is deemed socially or biblically acceptable or unacceptable,

and constantly re-shaping it to meet one’s own desires, habits, and beliefs.

If you can’t live with the rules, change the rules.  There is no absolute measure of right and wrong.  Just be yourself.

Adapt the truths instead of adapting yourself to truths.

Maybe a perfect example of liberal thinking happened recently in the world of college football.

Last year’s Heisman trophy winner Johnny Manziel  was seemingly in big trouble for signing autographs for money.

This is a practice clearly against NCAA rules for its student athletes.

Manziel is a kid from a wealthy family who apparently wanted something immediately that

exceeded what his budget would allow,so he knowingly broke the rules to make some quick bucks.

The alarming part wasn’t that the NCAA penalty was a whopping half-game suspension.

The disturbing part was the outcry of national media folks  defending Manziel because the “rules weren’t fair”.

manziel

He “should” be able to sell autographs for money.  Let’s change the system.

Forget the fact that he thought he was bigger than the system and the rules that were in place.

His university is making big bucks from his affiliation with their football program.

Sooooo, I mean, who can blame him?  Right?  Wrong, blame falls squarely on him.

We should….

Everybody deserves……

But it’s not fair…….

Let’s change it.  Redefine what’s acceptable so people can do what they feel is fair (my favorite word).

And so I silently stew and fuss.  Finally try to make it a teaching point for my teenage son about consequences

and the lengths that people go to to avoid facing them……

and how easy it is to enlist supporters in this quest.

Then.  Then, I wonder if I am in fact a liberal in my own church?

Maybe I’ve seen a tradition or perhaps a widely accepted view and set out to ignore it or change it?

No, I’m not talking about selling the church piano on ebay and sneaking in a bad reincarnation of Stryper to lead worship.

stryper

I am talking about people’s views on what is acceptable dress in churches.

I have silently and systematically rebelled against the notion that people have to dress in a certain manner when they enter God’s house for worship.

More specifically, it sort of itches my rear when someone expresses with words, attitutde, or looks a displeasure or disapproval with another’s choice of attire.

Modesty?  Of course.  Nobody wants to see some guy in a wife-beater just because he wants to show off his new tattoos  and big guns.

Ladies, if your skirt is shorter than my underwear,

I would have to question why you would wear that anywhere in public, not just church.

And perhaps even the sloppiest of dressers like myself should make some concessions.

I won’t wear the same shoes to church that I mow the yard in, and I have an Iron Maiden

“Trooper” shirt with blood splatters that I save for special occasions of a different type (date night with my wife-it’s her favorite shirt you know).

I think it’s awesome when people feel the need to put on their “Sunday finest” as a matter of reverence toward God.

benny hinn

But is it sometimes done for show or to meet the expectations of men?  Is it an exclusionary tradition that keeps new people away from church?

Obviously, people grasp for the closest and most convenient reasons why they can’t or won’t at least visit your church.

Most common phrase I hear is, “I don’t have anything to wear”.

Save your money and I’ll check back with you when you have enough to buy nice clothes?

I live with the philosophy that every church needs a good number of people that can honestly say,

“you can dress like me.  I wear what I’m wearing now, blue jeans and t-shirt.”

It’s not a lack of reverence, just a sign of outreach.

Let’s eliminate one reason you have for not taking the first step toward knowing Jesus as your savior.

What if I get up to preach (gasp!) in sandals and a wrinkly t-shirt?  Would you listen?

Would nicer, more traditional “preacher attire” make me a more credible

speaker of God’s word?  Gee, maybe I gave all my money to the poor and an old Stryper shirt is all I have left?

You just don’t know.

Do I honestly own nice clothes?  No.  Doesn’t matter if I can’t afford them or simply choose not to spend for them.

Do I try to poke holes in man-made traditions?  Yes.

Am I drifting into liberal waters?   Perhaps, but I’m not crossing the line of worship evolving into a casual or cool event either.

Am I attempting to change God’s commands or truths?  Absolutely not.

Bottom line.  Why do you do what you do?  Because your parents did it this way?  Because the Bible says?

Know the difference.

For a person to find find a relationship with God, somebody has to have a relationship with THAT person.

Churches need to find the ability and willingness to attract and welcome all types of people.

Besides, Stryper didn’t reach too many with their Christian 80’s hair metal.

Somebody still has to be able to reach out to the Iron Maiden and Slayer fans, right?

Don’t judge me.  Just go along with me.  Sometimes even sit with me.

Oh dear, I’m not a liberal, but I know now why I have the only one-man pew in my entire church.

The Model Father

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How do we measure the lasting effect of a father’s influence?

I’m 45 years old.  I still make daily decisions under the thought process of,

“how would my dad handle this situation?”

KR and Pappaw at Final Four

Why?  Not because he ever micro-managed any aspect of my life at any point.

Not because he talked so much that I quit listening.

My father has modeled for me through the years the simple practice of doing the right thing, making good decisions.

How long will my influence last in the lives of my four children?

When does the talking and the hands-on teaching start to fade away and give way to the

practice of consistent modeling for a Christian dad (or mom)?

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Teaching moments come in obvious forms when our children are small.

Their blunders are obvious.  The inquisitive questions are many.

But what may not seem obvious is that our time with them and their dependence on us diminishes with each passing day.

Before you realize it, your kids aren’t kids anymore.  They become teenagers, young men, young ladies.

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They don’t particlarly want to spend too much time in the presence of their dad anymore (shocking, right?).

You may reach some strange realization that your role as a father is diminished.  You just aren’t “needed” for much anymore.

What happened to the days when you sat in the floor coloring, playing board games, wrestling?

The days of being bombarded with goofy questions?  “Why daddy?”  “When daddy?”

Those days are gone.

What is my value in their life now?

Same role that it has always been for anyone who takes seriously the privilege of being called daddy.

Teacher, protector, mentor, provider……..model.

Your children are no longer standing over your shoulder watching your every move and bombarding you with questions.

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But they’re still watching.  In many ways, their need for you may be greater than ever during their teenage years.

The opportinities to be a positive impact in their lives haven’t gone away, they’ve just rearranged a bit.

Do your kids hear people only talking about the importance of prayer and bible study?

Or do they witness their parents consistently doing these things?  Do they see that it’s a priority in your life?

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To understand the importance of Christian modeling by parents is to come to realize that each day is filled with endless opportunities to do great things that will make a lasting impact in the lives of our children.

How will they understand the concepts of love, grace, and obedience to God if we don’t bring these things to life consistently in their presence each day?

So many chances each day……to do the right thing…..to simply obey God, even when it’s not the easiest path to take.

They may not be asking questions, but they’re watching.  And they’re grading you.  Do your actions match up with what they’re learning that it means to be a Christian?

Every word, every encounter, every day, they all count.

Honesty, integrity, and purity in every situation.  No exceptions.

Treating others with kindness, respect, and love.  Choosing our words and tone of voice wisely.  They’re listening.

Grace.  Do we forgive?  Do we quickly admit our own mistakes and ask forgiveness?

I’m not sure when kids pass that tipping point of whether or not they still want to be just like dad when they grow up.

But I’m positive that if I give my best effort each day to obey God and to match my own character with that of my savior Jesus Christ……

that desire will never leave them.

Seek the type of lasting impact that has positive eternal consequences.

OK, I guess I really am still needed around here!

Learning To Give

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my boysBengals trip 2012.  Who Dey!

An act of kindness.

Some people aren’t very skilled or willing when it comes to recognizing opportunities and taking action.  I would be one of those people.   That’s where my wife comes in; recognizing needs of others, lending a hand willingly, and sometimes letting me know when I’m guilty of living in oblivion.

She became involved in an outreach program through our church where she became a “football mom” to 3 or 4 student athletes each year at Kentucky Christian University.  I assume the spirit of the program has been to give young men, that are many times 1000+ miles from home, a connection with a local family and to make the transition a bit easier for life far away from home and family.
A support system.

Typical football mom duties would include taking snacks, homemade cookies, etc.  to campus or inviiting football players into our home for a home-cooked meal.  Some kids don’t have a need or desire for this type of support system, so it basically has given us a chance to develop relationships with one or two “assigned” players each year.

Our family has had the pleasure of developing friendships with quite a few of these young men over the last three years, but one player in particular seems to have had a huge impact on my faith in ways that I never could have imagined.
Dominique wasn’t one of our assigned players but was a friend of some of our “regulars” and showed up at our house with a group of players one evening after a home game. Quiet young man, pretty hard to engage in conversation with. Reminded me so much of myself at that age. Pretty sure he fell asleep on a loveseat that first night and I convinced him to stay the night instead of driving back to campus, sleep in my son’s bed.
I don’t remember the conversation I had with my wife that night, but I remember how it ended, “Kristy, I really think he needs us, needs to be part of our family.” Of course I didn’t know what the heck that meant.
But God has a way of clearing things up a LOT…..when we trust Him even just a LITTLE. I’ve never been the “loving” type. I have crazy love for my family but I’m pretty private and stingy with the rest of the world. You know, just loving the people that are easy to love. Keeping a tight circle and being very reluctant to let others enter into it.  And I’ve said it many times, “we may not be able to see any particular way that we are gifted to serve God, but we can all love”. I knew it, but I never lived it.
Dominique became a regular at our house, sometimes showing up out of the blue by himself, sometimes with friends. And what may have seemed strange at times, seems so cool to me now. The times he would be at our house for a good length of time before we even knew he was here, settled in front of the tv watching a football game. The times he seemed discouraged with circumstances and I tried to find the right questions and give the right words of encouragement….and struggled. The times he helped himself to whatever was in the fridge and  did piles of laundry here (just like I used to do at my parent’s).
When I put all those things together, it paints the greatest picture. Dominique has become exactly like one of our own children, doing exactly as our children do in our home.
A level of comfort that has grown out of love and trust, I hope.
Small gestures here and there, nothing deep and personal.  Just a place to feel loved, welcomed…..comfortable.
At some point, I realized that I had a genuine concern for his wellbeing, and this was not a feeling that was common to me.
Clarity came on Father’s Day this year just how God has used him as a wonderful blessing in the life of me and my family. I was sitting in church on that Sunday morning when a text popped up on my phone (no I don’t text in church, but I made an exception).
Happy Father’s Day
“Thanks, that means a lot that you thought of me today”
You’ve always treated me like a son.
BOOM
Tears filled my eyes as I passed my phone over to my wife. It hit me so hard, the realization of my years of failure at loving others the way that God desires.  And I realized that I’m not the same man that I was before I met Dominique.

I love this young man. My family loves this young man.  I thought I could be a blessing in his life.

It seems clear now that God placed him in my life to change me, to teach me how to love.
Dominique plays his last college football game today. I hope I have honored him in some way by sharing this.
Good luck today, old buddy. And thanks for helping me find my way.  Thankful that God has placed you in our life.

dominique

Honored to be your “football dad”.

The Awesome 80’s

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I see people share pages on Facebook that say “you know you’re a child of the _____ if you remember this.

So here is my version.  You know you were a teenage boy of the 80’s (with a slant toward the world of sports) if:

You either liked Bird or Magic, but not both.

You owned a pair of Converse All-Stars (bonus points if you painted the star your school colors)

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You can name all 6 actresses who were Charlie’s Angels.

You hated the Detroit Pistons.

You have stumbled onto an episode of Happy Days in recent years and wonder how you ever found it tolerable.

You thought the Mattel handheld football and basketball games with lighted lines for players were awesome.

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You thought the graphics on Intellivision were awesome.

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You thought Daryl Dawkins shattering a backboard was a greater feat than putting a man on the moon.

You heard the story of Darrel Griffith grabbing a coin off the top of a backboard.

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You had at least one argument over pronouncing Nike the right way.

You remember the Zips commercials (Zips a big z)

You realize you could have been rendered sterile from wearing skin tight jeans and basketball shorts.

You argued with at least one guy that swore he could hit a baseball further with a wood bat than with an aluminum bat.

You got excited when you pulled an Oscar Gamble card out of a package of Topps baseball cards.

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You became an expert on the different types of tape because you had to put tape on every wiffle ball bat to keep from destroying them and to add distance.

You got pretty excited about the invention of the cassette adapter (so you could play them in your 8-track player).

You stayed up late on Friday night because that was the only time to watch an NBA game.

You made fun of Rick Barry for shooting free throws granny style.

You were determined that you wouldn’t buy cd’s because you owned 200 cassettes.

You still buy cd’s and call them albums.

You can name 6 guys who owned a Chevy Chevette or a Ford Escort.

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Your parents still don’t know you watched “10” or “Animal House” when you were 11.

You knew that going down a hill on a skateboard too fast could kill you because all skateboards sucked and the wheels would start wobbling at high speeds.

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You know what “backwards masking is” and can still remember the backwards message of at least 3 songs.

You still can’t get your wife or children to truly appreciate the musical brilliance of Van Halen.

I’m Not Gonna Do It, So Don’t Ask

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I swear, if one more person asks me to do
something, it’s gonna get ugly!
“I’m not really looking for anything else to do right now.”
“I’ve got about all I can handle.”  or even,
“I could probably do more,
but I’m just not going to right now.”
I can promise you that I have said these things out loud
or thought them thousands of times.
It’s easy to drift into that
“if I can just get through this day” mentality.  Survival.
The craziness of a full-time job and raising kids.
Plus, there are people at church that ask me to do things
all the time……surely they don’t understand how BUSY I am.
Nobody else could possibly be as busy as me, right?
Get somebody else to do it.
I AM FULL
But……I can also promise you the biggest
failings that I’ve had as a Christian
(and father, husband, business person, etc)
have not been due to sin, but instead due to apathy and
laziness.  Overestimating how busy or tired I am,
not caring enough about others to get off my butt and
get moving.  And most importantly, failing to take into
account the love, strength, and guidance of my
Heavenly Father when making plans or figuring
out how much “I” am capable of taking on.
I sit still.
I fail to serve, grow, love, or live life to the full
because I simply fail to trust God.
1 Peter 4:11 tells us, “If anyone serves, they should do so
with the strength God provides, so that in all things God
may be praised through Jesus Christ.”
I don’t know of any organization that is made up of
individuals who view themselves as slackers, lazy,
underachieving, or doing just enough to get by.
But every family, church, business, and sports team is
filled with people who think they are giving their best
and doing all they can do, when they’re really not.
We’ve all seen that person and been that person.
Doesn’t do any good to have others tell us we can do
more and be more until we decide to change,
to trust God more and rely on His strength and not our
own to get us moving in the right direction.
Whether you need God to push you or pull you,
you have to trust Him enough to take the first step in the
right direction.  Stop living uphill, fighting a losing battle
on your own.  Find positive momentum.
Start moving and let Him keep you moving.
You might surprise yourself.
You might even (gasp!) start looking for something more to do.

Maybe I Am a Role Model?

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barkley role model
Nobody wants to follow a loser
(unless you’re a loyal Bengals fan).
Acquiring followers requires success,
credibility, winning.
Most of us don’t seek to rule the world
(or even the entire tri-state area if you follow Phineas & Ferb)
or seek 1,000 Facebook friends or Twitter followers.
And we might buy into the old Charles Barkley
“I am not a role model” line.
But like it or not we all influence the people
each day that our life touches.
Pretty serious business when we call ourselves Christians.
Ultimately we aren’t looking for “followers”, but trying to
live in a way that will lead others to follow the One that
we follow.
I’ve never been so wowed by someone’s biblical
knowledge that I was motivated to make
major changes in my life.
But I have certainly been influenced by those
who lean on the understanding of God’s word and
His promises, especially when they hold close to these
things in life’s most difficult times.
Do we live like winners or losers?
The Bible was not written to simply be studied.
Possession of knowledge by itself has no real value.
The Holy Bible was written to change us….constantly.
change obama style(If we could change him, that would be nice also), but seriously………
Success?  Certainly not financial or in ways of the world.  Success (being a winner) shines brightest in our relationships.  Do our relationships cause others to look favorably on our faith…..our Lord?  Sure relationships are tough because
we can’t correctly do anything that we simply do not
understand (insert husband, wife, or boss joke here).
We must constantly seek understanding daily from
God’s word that changes our hearts……
and changes our lives.
When we struggle with relationships,
we may not necessarily struggle with God,
but solutions are certainly found in HIS living word.
Credibility or our ability to influence those around us in a
positive way, comes not simply from knowledge, even
Biblical knowledge.  It comes from living powefuly for God
in our relationships as evidenced by unconditional love,
sacrificial love, and extending to others the same grace that is given to us.
People can’t see our minds, our hearts, or our intentions.  But they form opinions of our faith based on our words, our actions, our reactions, and the times we fail to take the necessary action.
Winner or loser?
Direction of your influence?
Figure out where it’s going and use God’s word each
day to begin to steer it in the right direction.
If someone seeks faith-related answers from you, will
your life dictate that you will have credibility in your answers?

Choosing Joy

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teddy

http://wapc.mlb.com/play?content_id=26392353

When you have the right allies,
there is no need to worry about the
strength of your enemies.
Teddy, a 30 year old man with Downs Syndrome
displays joy in the purest form in this video from
an April 18th Cincinnati Reds game.
Serving in the role of bat boy in this particular game,
Teddy seems to have a special
bond with Reds 3rd baseman Todd Frazier.
Following a Frazier home run, Teddy rushed from the
dugout to greet Frazier with uncontrollable excitement
and enthusiasm after he crossed home plate
(with a meaningless run to make the score 11-1).
But the camera kept going back to the bat boy,
and every camera shot showed him smiling at the
top of the dugout steps, pumping his fists and
looking toward theskies as if to say,
“Thank you God! This is the greatest moment ever.”
As the game progressed, additional camera shots of
this wonderful young man showed that, to him,
pretty much everything is “the greatest ever”.
Retrieving a bat from the field, running onto the field to
give the home plate umpire a fresh supply of balls…….
same enthusiasm, fists pumping, looking toward the skies…..greatest moment ever.
Watching this young man with tears pouring down my
face, I knew there were lessons to be learned just from
watching him.  On the surface, it was easy to see that
this young man’s joy was so contagious, putting smiles
on the faces of the players  and obviously capturing the
hearts of the commentators and anyone watching on tv.
I’d also venture to guess that Teddy
has the ability to bring out a caring side in people with a
special talent that few others possess.
In Matthew 18:3 Jesus said,
“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” 
It occurred to me that Satan is the one who robs us of our joy.  And it would appear that God gives children and special individuals like Teddy a special protection that does not allow Satan to steal their joy (there was such a pure innocence in his joy).  Satan cannot take away ours either unless we allow him to.  When our faith increases, we draw closer to God.  As He becomes greater, we become less, and we grow in peace and JOY.  We can trust Him more, much in the same way a child trusts parents without question and fully realizes their dependence on them.  We  DO have the right ally and
we must lean on Him daily to defeat our enemy and
claim what is rightfully ours as his children…..
A full life of peace and joy!

Blindsided From the Front

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distraction sign
I should have seen that coming.
But I didn’t, even though I’d been there before.
Maybe more than once.
Falling victim to the same temptation.
The same bad reaction in a familiar situation.
Feelings hurt and relationships damaged.
I could have changed direction, changed my course,
“if I’d only seen it coming.”
Uh…..so why didn’t I see it coming?
I coach middle school basketball and sometimes it’s difficult to
hold back my sarcastic nature.  The thought in my brain that rarely
escapes my lips is this,
How many times are you going to do it in a way completely opposite of the way
you have been instructed, and keep getting unfavorable results…….
before you commit to doing it the right way and getting positive results?
Gee, you think God has a sarcastic side?  I guess not.
But I’m sure I could stir it up pretty regularly by ignoring His commands from His word.
Proverbs 22:3 “A prudent man sees danger and takes refuge, but the simple keep going and suffer for it.”
danger sign  
On the simplest level, it reminds us that we have to recognize danger ahead and steer away from it.
The next level of this is to commit to not repeating the same mistakes over and over.
On a deeper level, we have to learn to recognize our own patterns of vulnerability.
Identify situations when we are most likely to be at our worst, our weakest.
Don’t let your guard down.  Do not be distracted.
Exercise caution in times of physical pain or fatigue and emotional pain or stress.
Living your life at a high rate of speed, relying only on your own strength and limited wisdom?
All these things open the doors of temptation.
And so we find ourselves, time after time, in situations where we do things that we know we shouldn’t do
or don’t like ourselves for doing, failing to even recognize temptation until it’s too late.
But our blind spots shouldn’t be blind spots when we’ve been through them time and again.
Blind spot for me?
Being short, grouchy, or simply inattentive to loved ones who desire and deserve more from me. 
We cannot ignore the situations that we know we are sure to face and fail to have the vision
required to face them the way God desires.
Invite God into situations early and often.  Study His word with an open heart and mind
with an eager desire to transfrom your way of thinking into His way.
My defenses are low, I feel like terrible physically, I am short on patience, I feel overwhelmed with life
……..these things may happen, I won’t be surprised!
Look ahead, plan ahead…..look up.  Pray!  Seek strength and direction from God.
Reflect on past mistakes and failures for the purpose of changing your course moving forward.
Know exactly “how you will not react” and “how you will react”
in moments of weakness.  See danger, steer away from it.
Sometimes it’s as simple as making plans to keep your mouth closed.
Know where those weak spots are and don’t walk into them with your eyes closed.
God will be there waiting when you come to those moments.
Awareness of His presence, love, and strength must come BOTH before and during crisis situations.
Failure comes when we continue to invite Him in only after we screw up.

I’m Not Really Gay, Am I Back On the Team?

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jason collins

As the NBA season tipped off, I was curious to know if JasonCollins had found his way onto an NBA roster this season after publicly announcing, at the end of  last season that he is gay.  The answer is NO.  But in my search, I came across an article that provides a good example of the double standard that exists in our“Just Be Yourself” nation.  Written by Jeff Pearlman on cnn.com, he acknowledges that fact that Collins averaged just 1.1 points per game last season, but decries the fact that no NBA team has made him an offer.  Here is part of the article:

“Jason Collins, however, ceased being ordinary the moment he announced he was gay.  To thousands upon thousands of Americans, he became a beacon of hope and a sign that maybe sexuality would matter not the in machismo-stuffed world of professional sports.  If LeBron James and Kobe Bryant and Chris Paul could embrace a gay man as a teammate,  what excuse would the loudmouth, homophobic blockhead at the construction site or law firm have for his close-mindedness?  Finally, things were about to change.  Only they weren’t because, well, nobody called.  The NBA has been repeatedly defended in its inaction with predictable attacks on Collins’ game– too slow, too marginal, too worthless. Yet could somebody (anybody?) have at least invited him totraining camp  — land of myriad oafs and fringe players itching to land a job?”

He then goes on with his ridiculous attempt at a Jackie Robinson comparison.  One problem here is that Jackie Robinson didn’t have to announce to the world that he was black.  Jason Collins chose a lifestyle.  Many celebrated his courage for coming out.  By coming out in such a public way, he forced the NBA and the country to react.  And it seems that the same segment that lashes out at those who have the nerve to call homosexuality a sin (because moral views are being “forced” onto others?) are indeed doing their best to force people into reacting in a certain way.  I don’t have a problem with accepting and loving people for who they are.

I don’t have a great desire to judge or change people  (for Christians, if we live as Christ then we are given opportunities to influence others,but that’s another discussion).  I do have a problem with the growing national movement of being told how I’m supposed to react to certain things.  The Bible is my guide for how I view the world around me. 

If I am presented with something that goes against this, I refuse to agree.  In my disagreement, I may choose to simply walk away.

Stop attacking my right to walk away.   Stop forcing a response simply so you can attack my response.  I love you.  I accept you.  I’m not forcing my views on you, so please don’t try to re-define mine.

Pearlman goes on:  “Adding Collins to a roster — even a preseason roster — would likely have meant awkwardness, confusion and weirdness.  There almost inevitably would have been conservative Christian teammates asking to change in a designated private space.  Special press conferences would need to be arranged.”

Ok, there’s the universally accepted shot at Christians.  I guess I should have seen that one coming.  That’s acceptable for all, right?

Shots taken at Tim Tebow on national TV and national media= too many to count  Shots taken at Jason Collins on national TV and national media=Zero…….it’s not allowed.  Neither one is playing the game they love.  Do we have to take shots at either one of them?  Bottom line- Collins created the “awkwardness”.  He forced a reaction.  And here is Pearlman in classic fashion, trying to define for the rest of us what our reaction should be.  Some hail Collins as a hero.  NBA teams try to silently walk away.  I’m sure players and fans alike would accept him as they would any other player.  But his skills and age dictate that he is not “any other player”.   If his ability to play adds nothing to a team, it’s insane to suggest that any team is obligated to give him a chance simply because he is gay. 

Maybe one general manager could take this approach,  “I know all the other teams are trying to win a title.  But let’s try to boost our image as a progressive thinking organization.    Our other players will enjoy a media circus revolving around a guy that can’t play anymore.”  They’d be better off as a team to fill their last roster spot with Bill Russell as a publicity stunt.

And maybe CNN would be better off to replace Pearlman with another guy that can’t write (just because he’s gay?)